What Can We Do With The Blame?

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What Can We Do With The Blame? I was researching articles about sexual abuse and spirituality for a Pinterest board I pin on named God and Abuse and I found an interesting article below.

Do-It-Yourself Healing From Sexual Abuse under the section named “What Can We Do With The Blame?”


I included the specific excerpt relating to God below.

3. We could blame God

Again, this option brings a degree of comfort, because it draws our attention away from ourselves, but it keeps the wound open and festering.

Just as by a cruel trick of the mind, innocent rape victims can feel justified in blaming themselves, we can feel justified in blaming God. Such feelings can be strong and yet are as tragically out of touch with reality as a dangerously skinny victim of anorexia nervosa feeling convinced that she is fat.

Here’s a tiny story to highlight in a few words the tragedy that keeps so many sufferers of sexual abuse from discovering the key to healing.

  • A kind, soft-hearted doctor is particularly fond of a little patient of hers. All that the little child can focus on, however, is the vaccinations the doctor gave her and the painful stitches in her cuts. To her childish mind, that caring, tender-hearted doctor is not a healer but a torturer. One day the child is strolling along the sidewalk when suddenly she sees the doctor approaching. In her panic she flees across the road and is hit by a car, breaking her leg. Of course, the first on the scene is that dreaded doctor.
  • In time, her physical pain is overshadowed by the shame of walking with a severe limp. It scars her whole life, making her unpopular at school, later interfering with her marriage prospects, her career opportunities, her self image, and countless other aspects of her life.
  • All of this inflames her hatred of doctors. She spends her life avoiding them and so never discovers that simple surgery would have totally cured her limp.

Like that little child, a misunderstanding causes far too many survivors of sexual abuse to waste their lives resenting and avoiding God. What makes resentment against God so tragic is that if there truly is a caring, supernatural God, then he, like no therapist in the world, would understand and feel your pain and be able to bring you healing.

The God you thought you hated isn’t real. The real God, as contrasted with the monster your imagination might have created, is tender, compassionate, and understanding. This is not an easy concept to grasp, living as we do in a world that is violently opposed to his ways of love and justice.

Blaming God keeps you from the one Person who fully understands your anguish, who offers perfect comfort, and is able to bring supernatural healing. Resenting God is ultimately as self-destructive as suicide, and as counterproductive as a drowning person fighting off his rescuer.

Hating yourself is a dead end. Hating another person keeps you in pain. And hating God is just another variation on hating another person. In fact, resenting people can be as spiritually suicidal as resenting God. Both forms of resentment build a wall between you and your Healer.


Monkeys are easily trapped by placing food behind a small opening. When they slip their hand in and grab the food, their hand becomes a fist that is bigger than the opening. Refusing to let go, they remain firmly caught until seized by hunters.

For as long as we make a fist at someone (even at ourselves, or at God) we, too, are trapped. While we hold on to our bitterness, we are unable to leave our painful past behind and get on with life. There is just one other option. It’s now time to explore it.”


I hope that you find this helpful. For more information from this article, please follow the link given.